HATRED

I was watching the John Piper video again that I posted a while back about the prosperity gospel. I just felt the need to get a little jump in my step if you know what I mean. And that will always do it for me I'm pretty sure. I just think he is so dead on with that. I was thinking about my past the other day and I came to the conclusion that I wouldn't trade my trials (as small as they were) for anything.  I didn't have a bad life by any means I'm just saying it was what most people would call ideal. But if one day someone can benefit from the fact that I had no family, except my Aunt, my mom almost killed herself on Christmas this year and called me from jail when I was 15 years old to tell me I'd have to find a new ride home.... if through all of that... which please please hear my heart in this... I am not in anyway trying to have a pity party here... I wouldn't trade those things for anything.. because if one day someone can see just how big God is because, through all that pain, his grace proclaimed through me, BLESSED BE THE NAME OF THE LORD. GOD IS ENOUGH. Oh man how I would never trade any of it for an "easy" life. Like JP was saying, I just do not foresee the poorest people looking at the rich American Christian and saying wow God gave you a BMW?? No wonder you love God I'll love him too, maybe he'll give me fancy things. NO!! People don't see a reflection of God in money. It can't happen. People see the real God when , as JP said, in the times when it hurts the most, when your family is shot to death in your home or your little girl flies out of the car windshield and lies dead on the ground, or when you don't have enough money to pay the bills or when you are diagnosed with cancer... it is in those times when you say GOD IS ENOUGH... that is when the world sees God for who God is. I need to examine myself more daily... am I praising the created thing or the creator. If suffering shows just how glorious my God is... then give me trials and give me poverty. Blessed be the name of the Lord. 

The reality of Hypocrisy

So I actually learned something in my Psycho-pathology class tonight (usually it is just a class where people like to talk about their personal lives and argue with each other and nothing gets accomplished). What I learned tonight though was not about addictions, depression or anything of the sort, it was that "Christians" today are giving the name of God a bad bad bad rep.  My teacher was talking about why people who are hurting and addicted don't run to church to get help... people started commenting and then general consensus was that in church everyone has to put on the "Christian" face and make everything look like all is fine whether it really is or not. 

That disturbed me. I hope it disturbs you too. I mean what is it we are really doing here.

Jesus in line with the sinners

At SMIC Pastor Harry is preaching through the book of Mark and the past two Sunday's we have focused on the baptism of Jesus. Yesterday he focused on how one reason that Jesus was baptized was so that he could identify with the people He came to save. I have honestly never thought much about the baptism of Jesus before this but it really is an awesome picture of who our Savior is. He was God yet he chose to submit to the Father's will and get baptized right along with the sinners. I think Luke 3:21 gives a good picture of the baptism. It reads, "Now when all the people were baptized, Jesus was also baptized..."

Jesus stood in line with the sinners, even though He was perfect. He wanted the worst of the worst to know that He came for them. How awesome is that! It truly makes me marvel at my master that he would leave behind never ending praise and fellowship with the Father to come and identify with me. He felt what I feel, yet remained perfect. Tell me how that does not demand complete devotion. For he does not break off the bruised reed (me), nor extinguish a dimly burning wick (me again) (Isaiah 42:3). 

Blessing and Honor Strength and Glory and Power be to God the only Wise King

Be encouraged.

Be blessed.

Decisions

Ohhhhhhhhhhh decisions. Many to be made.

Rick Burgess - A Father's Heart part 2

This is one of the best gospel presentations I have ever heard. Most likely because it comes from a heart of a father who just lost his son. Rick address a tough issue that the worlds tend to throw in the face of Christians in a time of crisis... "If God loves us then why in the world would he let this happen?"

Rick puts it this way, which is so so true: he tells us to look at it this way. We were all bound for hell, the lake of fire and God in his absolute sovereignty chose to send his Son to this earth. Jesus walked with us, felt with us and ultimately suffered more than any of us, FOR US. He not only endured the physical pain of being a human, but He left perfect fellowship with the Father to come to earth only to have the weight of all of the sins of the people who would come to Him from ALL TIME before and after. So don't even throw the "God must not love us" card in there, because that is the most ridiculous thing you could ever say.

I say Amen to that and to hear that come from a man who just lost his baby speaks wonders for the kingdom of God. So thank you Rick Burgess for being a faithful servant of God and of His kingdom and for setting an example and challenge for many of us to strive toward.

Oh and one last thing, I don't think he said it in this clip but he was talking about how his family is lookin gat earthly things now. He said that Bronner was told repeatedly not to go in the office, but he always would go and take his crayons with him every time. Rick said that the other day he walked in there and Bronners crayons were on the floor, just where they were not supposed to be and he just crushed them into the carpet. Who cares about the carpet he said, his boy is with the Lord now, and that carpet will never be, so who cares. What an outlook. Oh how my heart desires to become like that. 

Be encouraged.

quiet or lazy... what am I?

Let me start off again by saying that I am in bed before 10pm for the second night in a row... Ohhhh yeah.

But to the point I was reading my dear friend Ree's blog and she addressed somehting that has been on my heart lately so I thought I would repost to see if anyone would give us some feedback. Here it is:

So me and Rach are taking this class together, Psycopathology and Culture. Thought it would be good, but it turns out our teacher, interesting as he is, chases every rabbit trail that is laid before him! I took a few lines of notes, and he covered ONE POINT of his outline...but I digress. Our discussion on psycology, if you could call it that, ended up being a discourse on materialism in the US. It started as a discussion on racism and then moved to entitlement, so that naturally lead to people, particularly this (our) generation having a sense of entitlement and wanting all that the World has to offer. But the general concensus of the class (well, of those that were paying atttention) was that, no matter what your parents gave you, what car you drove, what sports you played, etc, etc, NOTHING satisfies. A few ideas were thrown around, such as parental acceptance and love and notions of "religion".....but no one came forward with What Truely Satisfies.
Which leads me to another thing...I must confess I have been far too shy with proclaiming what I know to be True. I know the Truth, yet why have I not said something? I am not a shy person. I think mostly why I do not say anything in class is that I do not want to come across as the typical, judgmental Christian that no one takes seriously. I believe whole-heartedly that our actions and the way we lead our lives can make an enormous impact on others for Christ's Sake, but I feel proddeed now to make more of a vocal stand for His Name's Sake.
So the question I pose is this: What do you feel/believe is the BEST way to make an impact for God on campus/work/where ever? Please post your thoughts...this is something I'm searching out too!

                                                                                -AMLeveille

mixed emotions

So considering that I am in bed and it is 9:30 I felt and obligation to write a blog since it has been a couple of days. I have not been in bed at 9:30 in months. This weekend was full of mixed emotions for me. First off it snowed. I cannot describe to you how much I love snow. And it has been years since I have seen snow actually fall from the sky. It made me so happy. I went driving around town for a bit, and landed in Linn Park downtown. I was a little nervous at first because Linn Park is the homeless hotel if you know what I mean. But when I looked around and saw no one for blocks, my heart calmed. So I got out and walked around for a while. It was snowing pretty hard at this point so I was debating how much walking I really wanted to do. I mean I love snow and all but I was freezing. But as I stood there I just listened. It was that quiet that only happens when it snows. A wonderful quiet with the ever so light swish of the falling snowflakes. I just stood there and soaked it up. It encouraged my heart as I looked around and saw everything uniformly covered in a soft blanket of white. I thought of how because of Jesus this is how God looks at me. The feeling that I get when I look around and see snow isn't even comparable to the feeling that God gets when he looks at us and sees Christ, "our snow". There were no blemishes, no uneven ground, not flaws. How truly marvelous that Jesus can cover even our deepest flaws and makes us white as snow. And the best part is, He doesn't melt away and leave things uglier than before. Man what a blessing we have received. No words can express the gratitude in my heart for my Savior.

Aaaaanywho... I walked around for a bit and took some pics...look at my facebook album... and then decided to go to my mom and my grandmothers for a bit. Now this was divine intervention for sure. I don't know what made the idea pop in my head to go see them, but when I got there I knew why I had come. It hasn't snowed since my Aunt died ( My mom and grandma live in her house now by the way). So there I was, standing in front of the house that I grew up in, with all the memories of the woman who raised me and took me out day after day when it snowed (which happened a lot more when I was a kid). She wasn't here this time though. I looked up the road and thought of the countless times she drug me up that road on the sled and let me fly down, with much grace let me tell you, and soar across the ditch and come to a screeching halt just before I broke my self on the brick wall. I made my way inside and out the back door. As the flakes came down harder I was in awe of how many memories this house held for me. The house is now on the market by the way so not only was it snowing for the first time since my aunt died but her house, the house I grew up in, is being sold. I am by all means okay with the selling of the house and I know it is too much for my mom and grandma to handle, but nevertheless I was sad. The number of snowball fights that were had in that back yard. Not to mention picnics, Indian endeavors and endless games of tee ball. So needless to say it was a bittersweet moment. I don't usually think of my Aunt often these days, but nothing reminded me more of her than the snow. 

So once that bittersweet moment had passed I headed for the next. Work. It was my last shift that night at Bath and Body. I decided not to work this semester and focus on school and investing in people. I have worked there for over a year and God has shaped me so much through that job. I have never been in an environment where I had to be so careful to represent God in a way he deserved... which I know I failed at miserably a lot of times, but God used me as a light in that place and now I was leaving. I felt unaccomplished in a way. No one came to know Christ, but everyone most definitely knew that I belonged to Him. I spoke truth and planted seeds and I know His Word accomplishes it goal every time it is spoken and that is what I had to rest on.

So this weekend was full of emotional ups and downs for me. My God carried me all the way though. And for that I will never be able to say thanks enough. 

It Snowed!!!

Oh man. I am so happy. It did snow. Even though it was just a little but... about an inch or so... it was great. I just love it. Snow is so pretty. I am pretty sure that I was meant to live in the north. Well maybe not the north north although I would be okay with that, but just somewhere where it snows more than once every 8 years. It truly is my favorite thing, well one of them. It made my day that is for sure. Thanks for the blessing Lord, it was AWESOME!!!!

SNOOOOOOOOW

Okay so my hopes are officially up. It better snow. Well I guess I should say I am hoping with everything in me that it snows! I love snow. Love it Love it Love it. Ohhh please Lord, LET IT SNOW! 

John Piper on the prosperity gospel

AMEN AMEN AMEN. This nailed what my heart has been screaming for a year.

contentment by subtraction

So I have established that everyone is pretty much going to get a book review on Burroughs, 

"The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment". I am just learning so much from it and it makes so absolutely convicting points.

Such as:

 " A carnal heart knows no way to be contented but this: I have such and such possessions, and if I had this added to them, and the other comfort added that I have not now, then I should be contented. PErhaps I have lost my possessions, if only I could have something given to me to make up my loss, then I should be a contented man. But contentment does not come in that way, it does not come, I say, by adding to what you want, but by subtracting from your desires. It is all one to a Christian, whether I get up to what I would have, or get my desires down to what I have, either to attain what I do desire, or to bring down my desires to what I have already attained. My wealth is the same, for it is as fitting for me to bring my desire down to my circumstances, as it is to raise up my circumstances to my desires."

How often do we strive to gain contentment by trying at all cost to achieve our desires instead of realizing the need to simply lower those very desires to what we already have attainded. For the problem is not the lack of possessions or comfort, but the value placed on those possessions and comfort; and more so, quite frankly,  the skewed view of the word need. Oh to better and correctly define and use such a small word in my life. A feat to behold indeed. 

Be encouraged.

Charlie bit me

Please watch the big brothers face when Charlie starts biting harder. Priceless.

outward crosses and the dishonor of God

Amanda Cannon and I are reading this book together called the Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment by  Jeremiah Burroughs. It has been very challenging for me and very convicting as well of just how bad I am at being content. There are so many things that I want to work on this year and that is one of them. Contentment. I am so glad that God does not keep a record of rights and wrongs or I'm pretty sure that I would be at the bottom of the list when it comes to gold stars. Anyways there was an awesome point that Burroughs made in the first chapter of his book and I found it to be quite blunt and potent. He was addressing the issue of being content even when we are called to bear outward crosses. He then throws in a little side note here about unbelievers. He says, "To an unsaved person outward crosses and the dishonoring of God bring about the same emotion, whether they are crossed or God is crossed they are equally content." 

Bam! That is so true though. We as believers should feel a definite emotional difference when God is dishonored than when we are met with a trial or as Burroughs put it "crossed". I just found that to be a moving point.

 

Lifehouse's Everything Skit

This is an awesome video that is such a good visual of spiritual warfare. It's still very much active, yes even in our culture. 

Be encouraged.

shades of grey

So a good friend told me tonight that I am very black and white. That was one of the best compliments I think that I have ever received. As I was watching a Passion video tonight I was reminded of one of my pet peeves.... greyness. Okay so I know that greyness is not a word but just go with me on this one. Greyness. You know, not really this or that, hot or cold, or black or white for that matter. Just grey. Like a cloudy grey day. Okay bad analogy because cloudy grey day's are my favorite, sometimes, but you know what I mean. I feel like most people today are grey. They may say they are a Christians but they live very much in the world. They preach giving to the poor then get bent out of shape when their mercedes gets a flat on the way home. They see the homeless on the streets at night so they call a meeting at the country club next tuesday for lunch to talk about it. I share these thoughts with David Jeremiah who brought them to my attention in his book "Signs of Life". And mind you that the root of this in not the material possessions of the individuals but the heart is what I'm looking at here.  Why is it so hard to pick out a Christian these days? According to David Jeremiah we should be able to spot one from across the street. I can't say that someone would be able to do that with me...even though that is one of my greatest desires. To live an authentic Christian life oh what a feat to behold. It makes me mad that out of the same lips come a cry of Hosanna on Sunday and then "Smack dat" ( i'm funny i know) on Monday. I know I am no one to judge motives, for I myself would be a hypocrite if I said that I was never guilty of the same crime, but by the grace of God he is sanctifying me daily and I hope that the shades of grey in my life will continue to fade at a more rapid rate. For like I have said before, I truly am nothing with out my Savior. So yeah just a random thought for the day but it just kinda bugs me these days how people think they can be of God and of the world. Can't be like that yo. Peace homie

and my apologies... this blog is more of a bunch of scattered thoughts that just a solid thought. It's been a long day

Hillsong - Lord Of Lords

oh man... love it

trustworthy.

So this semester at UAB will prove to be incredibly interesting for me. I am taking 6 classes, intro international relations, Nationalism and world politics, 2-400 level European History classes, psycho-pathology and culture, and Spanish 201. Really... i know... I've lost my mind. Most of my professors are absolutely nuts too. My Italian Renaissance teacher locked me out of the room the first day of class because I was a minute late. He then proceeded to call role, tell some girl that she misspelled her name and that one guy needed to pick a new name because his original name was too boring. oh goodness. My Modern Europe teacher feels the need to clear his throat after every 3 to 7 words depending on the sentence structure. I have the same teacher for both Political Science classes. He refers to himself as the Messiah....yes the Messiah. And my psycho-pathology teacher is a very large Italian man who feels that the size of certain male body parts is the best possible topic of conversation. Then there is my Spanish teacher, a 24 year old italian boy (glad that my semester is not lacking in the Italian category). He is my favorite though, except that he digs himself into a hole every class when he feels the need to explain inappropriate spanish terms to us. So nevertheless it should prove to be an interesting semester. There is no shortage of garbage being thrown at me. Philosophical garbage that is. From students arguing about how religion, if it exist at all, does not influence your every day life, to a professor calling himself the Messiah, I am so glad that I have the lens of Christianity to filter it all through. Psalm 19: 7 keeps reeling in my head as the classes go on. It reads, " The law of the Lord is perfect, reviving the soul. The statutes of the Lord are trustworthy, making wise the simple." I am so thankful that I have the Word of God to compare and refute all of the trash that professors try to convince me is truth. For nothing else in this earth will hold fast as truth into eternity except the Word of God. I am excited about the semester. Excited to see how God will use me to promote his truth, but most excited to see how He will draw me closer to him through the trails I am promised to face. I am thankful for a lot this year, but I am most thankful for my Salvation, for it is the only thing that will never fail me. So here's to Spring Semester 08. It should prove to be great.. (That rhyme was just for you abby;) )

Sooooo a blog

Since everyone has decided to blog... so I figured I would give it a try. I'm not sure how good I will be at writing out my thoughts... I guess we will see. Abby Falls was my inspiration, so check out her blog too yo. She is sitting next to me so I thought I would throw that in. 

I'm pretty much excited about 2008 though. 2007 was such a good year for me, God called me to himself.. all of me, even the parts I didn't know that I had yet to surrender, and I walked closer with him this year than ever before. He called me to full time ministry this time last year and the more I walk in that calling the more that I realize that I have no idea where God will use me. I'm excited to see though and very excited to see where God will take me this year. 

Some goals for the year:

1. Live more simple: Simplicity is going to be the headlining theme for my year. I want to be more simple in everything, my thoughts especially.

2. Blog: I want to share more of what God does in my life with others. God is so so so good to me... why not share it.

3. Become more intentional: I am such a firm believer that God places people in our lives for a reason. If  you were to ask me today if I knew my next door neighbors names I couldn't tell you. I want to change that though.  I need to be less self focused and intentional with the people around me.

4. Become more frugal: My grandmother pays for my Insurance, cell phone and gas... yet I can't seem to hold onto a penny for some strange reason... that will change... with a little grace. Who knows what my expenses will be this coming year, I need to save. The root of this really is for me to become more eternally mindset. 

5. Romans: I want to deeply study the book of Romans. I think it is so rich that I want to spend a year just digging into it. 

6. Memorization: The Word of God is more powerful than a dead man risen from the dead. I'm pretty excited about implanting that in my heart. 

and I'm sure there is more that God will lay on my heart as the year goes one. This is it for now though.

More to come