Do I have a personality? Thoughts from Clive

So I have been thinking....it does happen believe it or not....

Who am I? Now this will not be cliche and I am not having a self identity crisis. Just some thoughts sparked by my favorite, C.S. Lewis.

I was talking to Heather the other day about how much I have truly begun to find myself since God turned my life 180 a few years ago. I was trying to explain... and not doing a good job of it at all... for those of you who know me this will not come as a shock bc we all know i have expression problems.

I finished Mere Christianity yesterday and Clive did an awesome job of summarizing what I was trying to express. God has really sparked a fire in my heart about this subject... excited to see where He will take it.

He was saying that the more we get "ourselves" out of the way, and begin to search for Him, the more truly "us" we become. When we look too much at "ourselves" we get los in a sea of our desires, our wishes, our goals, and our ambitions and often trick ourselves into thinking they are God's. You won't find yourself if you are looking for it within yourself. It is when we give our selves up to His personality that we begin to have a personality of our own. You won't find yourself until you find yourself looking for Him. Give up on trying to "find yourself" and start seeking the One who made you and you will, in return, find yourself. He says that those who bother so much with being original will never be original, but those who say what they mean, no matter how much it has been said, will always find originality. Good thoughts eh?

So in this time of transition for me, as I get ready for something big ( I feel it coming)...I will vow to spend less time thinking about me and trying to "find myself" and what "I" want to do and in return I will seek Him and who He calls me to be. In that I will truly find who I am.

I will say what I mean and mean what I say.
I am not defined by this world.